when the cliche is turning against conformity.

As we grow older, we get lonelier. We lose the innocence and trust which we once had in everyone else around us. The world teaches us to be wary, and as each day passes, you become a more experienced student and disciple, and realise the teachings you learnt, were eventually right.

When we were a child, you looked to your parents for guidance. If you fell down but see your mum laughing at you, you would grin and lift your butt right up off the floor. If your mum came rushing over with a scared look upon her face, your instincts would tell you something bad has happened, and you would break out in tears and bawl. Our instincts sharpen each day, till the extent some call paranoia. But the paranoia isn't to blame, the life in the world is. Some people only learn lessons through the hard way, while others choose to dodge the hard way and learn the lessons out of textbook knowledge and then get on with their lives. Either way, you don't escape from it, so eventually, what's the point?

Oh sure, some people wanna break out of this vicious cycle. I applaud you, and even envy your sentiment. But I don't endorse what you do. Because ultimately, you know the vicious cycle is never-ending, and escaping one is merely getting yourself trapped in another one. And if you look at the big picture, you would find out that all the cycles and cogwheels are what form the thing you call life. The thing that disappoints you, but force you to keep going. I don't blame those who wants to finish life up as soon as possible (not referring to anyone..) because I share the same sentiment. Sometimes, it's too disappointing for you to want to go on.

While some choose to brag about how they have overcome their inner struggles, and find the meaning to life, I laugh to myself at the sheer thought. Because in life, you don't find meaning. You find false hope, ephemeral optimism and perhaps laughably, happiness. There's no such thing as real happiness if you do care about others, because misery is all around. You're happy, but walk around the corner, and you see someone breaking down and succumbing to the pains in life. It's likely that you can still find happiness, by blocking out the pain of others, but putting yourself as the centre of focus of yourself. Yes, you're happy? Stop deceiving yourself.

Ironically, maybe the best way for you to find any tinge of meaning in life is to detach yourself from it - once and for all.